heres a lil mousey for u ~O3>

my sister wanted to have one of those hipster baths with flowers n shit but all we had was parsley…

95% of the time i’m pretending to be in some commercial for shampoo or diet coke don’t look at me 

this one time i took off my underwear and a live moth flew out and i cried 

c4rcinogencrush:

if you take me on a date to a zoo, aquarium, or museum the chances of me having sex with you goes up by about 900%

burghers:

i think u forgot to notice me and shower me with attention

drarna:

in protest of abercrombie & fitch only trying to market their clothing to good-looking people, i will begin buying and wearing their clothing

slyzor:

horton hears nothin bc imma hit that bitch if he keeps eavesdropping

cristinaya:

Shine bright like a washed nintendog